Best Jokes

When our son Jimmy went to Navy boot camp, we waited impatiently for word from him.

Finally we received a post card telling us he was doing well and we shouldn't worry. It went on to say that he was being kept busy acclimating to a military lifestyle and that he would send a detailed letter in a couple of weeks.

After reading his card a second time, however, we noticed that Jimmy had faintly underlined letters throughout the note.

When the letters were combined, his hidden message read, "Help me!"

Willpower: The ability to eat only one salted peanut.

Experience: A comb life gives you after you lose your hair.

Vacation: A time when parents realize that teachers aren't paid enough.

Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

“I’m worried about you always being at the bottom of your class,” said the father to his son.

“Don’t worry Dad,” he replied. “They still teach the same thing at both ends.”