Best Jokes

Did you hear about the banker who was recently arrested for embezzling $100,000 to pay for his daughter's college education?

As the policeman, who also had a daughter in college, was leading him away in handcuffs, he said to the banker, "I have just one question for you. Where were you going to get the rest of the money?"

His beloved old white convertible was in deplorable shape, but he refused to get rid of it. So when the old junker was stolen from his office parking lot, his family was delighted.

Nonetheless, they called the police and filed an insurance claim. Their relief was short-lived, within an hour an officer was on the phone.

"We found the car less than a mile away," he said, trying to restrain himself. "It had a note on it that read, 'Thanks anyway, we'd rather walk.'"

Business professor: "Who can give me an example of a system where you are billed before you actually receive your goods?"

Student: "Tuition!"

A Military lab has developed a pizza that boasts a shelf life of three years without being frozen, and now the Week has asked its readers to name this durable dish. Here’s what they came up with:

•Semper Pie
•The Lasting Supper
•In-dough-structible
•Pizza de Resistance
•DeFrigNo!
•Auld Lang Slice
•Eternal Piece
•Grandpapa John’s Pizza