Best Jokes

Why does it get hot after a baseball game?

Because all the fans leave.

My children are at the perfect age... too old to cry at night and too young to borrow my car.

Yo Momma so ugly, she needs a prescription mirror!

A man and a woman are sleeping together when suddenly there is a noise in the house. The woman quickly rolls over and blurts out, "It's my husband, you have to leave!"

The man jumps out of bed, gathers some of his clothing, jumps through the window, and crawls through the bushes and out on the street. After a moment, a realization sinks in. He calmly goes back into the house and says to the woman, "Wait, I'm your husband!"

Without missing a beat she replies, while giving him a dirty look. "So why did you run?"