Best Jokes

Last night, while my wife was asleep I decided to write algebraic terms all over her.

You should have seen the expression on her face!

A fellow with a very sore shoulder went to his doctor for a consultation.

"It looks like it's just inflamed," the doctor said as he looked at the x-rays. "A cortisone shot would likely calm done the pain for a while."

"But will it hurt?" the patient asked.

The doctor's responded, "I've given hundreds of these shots, and I've never felt a thing."

I told my wife that there is only one thing that scares me on Halloween.

My wife: Which is?

Me: Exactly!

Teacher: "What is a nitrate?"

Little Johnny: "I'm not sure, but it's NOT cheaper than a day rate!"