Best Jokes

Golfers wear two pair of pants.

Why?

In case they get a hole in one.

Two little boys were at a wedding when one leaned over to the other and asked, "How many wives can a man have?"

His friend answered, "Sixteen... four better, four worse, four richer, and four poorer."

Judi tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it because the car had 250,000 miles. One day, she told her problem to a friend she worked with at a salon. Her friend told her, "There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it's not legal."

"That doesn't matter," replied Judi, "as long as I can sell the car."

"Okay," said Judi's friend. "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will turn the counter in your car back to 50,000 miles. Then it should not be a problem to sell your car anymore."

The following weekend, Judi made the trip to the mechanic. Two weeks later the friend asked Judi, "Did you sell your car?"

"No," replied Judi, "why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it!"

A mother was worried that her three-year-old son was unusually precocious, and took him to a psychiatrist.

"Right," said the shrink, "We'll just try a few simple tests." To the boy, he said "Say a few words - anything that comes into your mind."

The boy turned to his mother and asked, "Does he want logically constructed sentences or just a few random and purely isolated words?"