Best Jokes

3 votes

What does a polar bear eat in the morning?

B-b-b-b-b-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-eakfast!

3 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "Kittiekat" |
$7.00 won 3 votes

The girl came running in tears to her father. "Dad, you gave me some terrible financial advice!" she cried.

"I did? What did I tell you?" said the dad.

"You told me to put my money in that big bank, and now that big bank is in trouble."

"What are you talking about? That's one of the largest banks in the world," he said. "Surely there must be some mistake."

"I don't think so," she sniffed. "They just returned one of my checks with a note saying, 'Insufficient Funds'."

3 votes

CATEGORY Business Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
3 votes

Mick and Paddy were working on the building site and stopped to have lunch. They sat on the 3rd floor veranda to eat their sandwiches. Paddy opened his lunch box and said, "I hate egg sandwiches." He then got up and threw them off the site onto the concrete below.

Next day, the same thing happened. He looked at his lunch box and said, "I hate egg sandwiches" and threw them over on to the concrete. The third day was similar, so he threw himself over on to the concrete.

Mick sent for an ambulance , to take him to hospital and then went to see Paddy's wife. He said, "I'm sorry to tell you this, but Paddy has been taken to hospital."

Paddy's wife said, "What happened?"

"I think it was your fault."

"Why would you say that?"

"Well, he said he hated egg sandwiches and threw himself off the balcony on to the concrete."

His wife said, "Well don't blame me, he makes his own sandwiches!"

3 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "Les Smedley" |
3 votes

Now that I'm older and life has slowed down I've had time to take a closer look at things. I've found so much humor in everyday things, so much so that I'll sometimes burst out in uncontrollable laughter and hysterics.

The local gang members must really like humor and seem to respect my new outlook on life. So much so that they always give me a wide birth even after dark.

3 votes

CATEGORY Elderly Jokes
posted by "Marty" |