What's the most important thing an elephant looks for when buying a car?
Trunk Space.
A fifth grade science teacher began her discussion of atoms by saying, "Never trust an atom... they make up everything!"
The mother of a problem child was advised by a psychiatrist, "You are far too upset and worried about your son. I suggest you take tranquilizers regularly."
On her next visit the psychiatrist asked, "Have the tranquilizers calmed you down?"
"Yes" the mother answered.
"And how is your son now?" he asked.
"Eh, who cares?" she replied.
Yo momma is so big...
She is so big that she jumped and got stuck!