When I moved into my new igloo my friends threw me a surprise house-warming party.
Now I'm homeless.
One minute you're young and fun...
The next minute you're turning down the stereo in the car so you can see better.
What did the former boxer-turned-barista ask his patrons?
"Ya want one lump or two???"
I've never been married...
... but I've had a few near Mrs.!!!