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Favorite this joke Life is like a roll of toilet paper...
The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes!
Our neighbors gave us a pumpkin pie as a holiday gift. As lovely as the gesture was, it was clear from the first bite that the pie tasted bad. It was so inedible that we had to throw it away.
Ever gracious and tactful, my wife sent the neighbors a note. It read: "Thank you very much for the pumpkin pie. Something like that doesn't last very long in our house."
What do you call a tree who can't finish a puzzle?
Stumped.
Elf: "Santa, we have finished making mints for every child."
Santa: "Mints?"
Elf: "Yeah, you said make Altoids."
Santa: "I said make all toys."
Elf: "Altoids!"
Santa: "All toys."
Elf: "Well this is a disappoint-mint."
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