Past Winners

I made a playlist for hiking. it has music from The Peanuts, The Cranberries, and Eminem.

I call it my trail mix.

Harry the Complainer and his wife happened to pass away on the same day and as they await their interview with St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, they're approached by an angel.

"Hello," says the angel. "I'm your host, and welcome to Heaven. In a few moments you'll be entering through our famous Pearly Gates for the most fantastic adventure you've ever experienced. You'll have a chauffeur driven limousine service anywhere in the universe, plus deluxe accommodations at our luxury hotel with all the amenities -- pool, Jacuzzi, indoor tennis courts, and more. Then after your day of relaxation, dine at any of our 5-star restaurants savoring the finest of any cuisine known to man."

At this point, Harry gives his wife a shove in the ribs with his elbow. "If it wasn't for you and that stupid oat bran, we'd have been here ten years ago!"

A man who apologizes when he’s wrong is called: HONEST.

A man who apologizes when he’s not sure is called: WISE.

A man who apologizes when he’s wrong is called: HUSBAND.

Walking through the company breakroom one afternoon, I was impressed to see two new employees, recent high school graduates, reading the newspaper.

As I walked by their table, I heard one say, "It says here that Bruce Springsteen is travelling incognito. I wonder where that is?"

The other replied, "I think it's in Mexico."