Past Winners

"What are you going to do this weekend?"

“I’m going to buy glasses.”

“And then what?”

“Then I’ll see.”

The farmers almanac has predicted a much colder winter than normal.

I have been observing squirrels and they are collecting more nuts than normal.

Which makes me wonder where my 3 cousins have disappeared to???

Different views on doing laundry...

Son away at college: If it's clean it goes on the floor. If it's dirty it goes on the floor over there.

Husband while wife is away: If I just take things out of the hamper as I need them, I do not have anything to fold.

Wife: With the amount of laundry I do, there must be more people living in this house!

Deciding to eat healthier breakfasts, my brother-in-law declared that oatmeal would now be his cereal of choice.

But after eating his first bowl, he told my sister, "I hope I develop a taste for the stuff. It goes down real rough."

"Well," she asked, "how long did you cook it?"

"You're supposed to cook it?" he said.