Past Winners

One shop owner asks another, "So, have you had any responses to your ad that you're looking for a night watchman?"

"Yeah, we got robbed last night."

Wife #1: Hey, Lynn, tell me this. How did you get your husband from staying out late?

Wife #2: Well, every time he would come home I would simply say, 'Mike, is that you?'

Wife #1: But I still don't understand. How did that kept him from staying out?

Wife #2: My husband's name is Andrew...

Little Johnny rushes inside, out of breath and shouts, "Mother! Mother! Give me some money for the poor old man that's shouting along the road!"

His mother replies, "What is he shouting?"

"Ice creams! Come get your ice cream..."

Leaving church one Sunday, a middle-aged woman said to her husband, “Do you think that Flanagan girl is dyeing her hair?”

“I didn’t even see her,” replied the husband.

"And that skirt Mrs. Fitzgerald was wearing,” continued the wife. “Don’t tell me you thought that was appropriate attire for a mother of four?”

“I’m afraid I didn’t notice that either,” said the husband.

“Huh!” scoffed the wife. “A lot of good it does bringing YOU to church.”