Golfer: "I'd move heaven and earth to be able to break 100 on this course."
Caddy: "Try heaven. You've already moved most of the earth."
I’ve always thought my neighbors were quite nice people...
But then they put a password on their Wi-Fi!
Question: What is Love?
Answer: The light of Life!
Question: What is Marriage?
Answer: The Bill for that Light!
Why does the sun rise in the east?
Because it can't rise in the west!