misc jokes

The best part about computers is that they make very fast, specific mistakes.

A software expert was being attacked over his new product. He was defensive and would not back down.

"Your software has bugs!"

The expert replied, “My software never has bugs... it just develops some random features, that's all.”

Doctor: What’s wrong with your bother?
Boy: He thinks he is a chicken.
Doctor: really? How long has this been going on?
Boy: Five years.
Doctor: Five years!
Boy: We would have brought him in earlier, but we needed the eggs.

A man walks into the psychiatrist’s office with a zucchini up his nose, a cucumber in his left ear, and a breadstick in his right ear. He says, “What is wrong with me?
The psychiatrist replies, “You are not eating properly.”