Do you ever wonder...
Why is no one ever the right amount of whelmed?
Congratulations to me!
I just made my last mortgage payment...
I still owe like $262,000, I'm just not going to pay them any more.
Television repairman: "So, what seems to be the problem with your TV?"
Homeowner: "Well, it has double images. I hope the two of you can fix it."
How do you please a woman in bed?
Let her sleep.