Best Jokes

$10.00 won 1 votes

My wife and I were at my high school reunion. As I looked around, I noticed the other men in their expensive suits ... and their bulging stomachs.

Proud of the fact that I weighed just five pounds more than I did when I was in high school, I said to my wife, "I'm the only guy here who can still wear the suit he wore when he graduated."

She glanced at the well-dressed crowd, then back at me, and said, "You're the only one who has to."

1 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "merk" |
$6.00 won 1 votes

Killing your father is called patricide.

Killing your mother is called matricide.

So, what is killing your friend called?

Homie-cide

1 votes

CATEGORY Puns
posted by "Ryan Faidley" |
1 votes

A man is asking a farmer about his two cows.

Man: About how much milk do you get from them in a day?

Farmer: Which one, the brown one or the black one?

Man: The brown one.

Farmer: About a half gallon a day.

Man: And the black one?

Farmer: About a half gallon a day.

Man (looking puzzled): Ok.. what do you feed them?

Farmer: Which one?

Man: The brown one.

Farmer: She eats grass.

Man: And the black one?

Farmer: She eats grass, too.

Man (becoming annoyed): Why do you keep asking me to specify which cow when the answers are the same?

Farmer: Because the brown cow is mine.

Man: Oh, and the black one?

Farmer: It’s mine, too.

1 votes

CATEGORY Farmer Jokes
posted by "Leibel" |
$12.00 won 1 votes

An elderly couple were discussing the news, and the husband read from the paper, "It says, 'After the collapse of FTX, Beyonce could be next.' Why would a singer be in trouble?"

The wife blurts back, "It's Binance, you idiot."

1 votes

CATEGORY Money Jokes
posted by "Bill Sauro" |