Best Jokes

Waiter: How do you like your steak, sir?

Sir: Like winning an argument with my wife.

Waiter: Rare it is.

Just spent $300 on a limousine and discovered that the fee doesn't include a driver...

Can’t believe I’ve spent all that money and have nothing to chauffeur it!

My husband and I both work, so our family eats out a lot.

Recently, when we were having a rare home-cooked meal, I handed a glass to my three-year-old and told her to drink her milk.

She looked at me bewildered and replied, "But I didn’t order milk."

If we are not to have a midnight snack, then why is there a light bulb in the refrigerator?