I went to a Star Wars smoke shop...
You can smoke alright, but you're not allowed to chew-bacca!
Jack had a oral hygiene problem for years but all of his friends were afraid to tell him because it would probably hurt his feelings they thought.
One day in our science class, we were paired together. Our station was missing it's microscope so Jack asked me to get one from elsewhere that was not being used. I came back to the our work station and handed him a .5 ounce bottle of mouthwash.
"What is this?" Jack asked. "I asked for a Microscope."
I replied, "I didn't give you what you wanted, but I gave you what everybody knows you need. A small bottle of Scope mouthwash. So I gave you a micro 'Scope'."
Two weeks ago a student wore a shirt to class with GUESS emblazoned across the front.
I advised her that that wasn't an advisable test-taking strategy.
Then last Friday, she wore a shirt advertising the band AC/DC...
Same advice.