Best Jokes

A mother says to her small son who is being mean as usual, “How do you expect to ever get into Heaven?” To this her son replies" I figure I'll just run in and out the pearly gates until St. Peter says either stay in or out"!

A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5, Ryan 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson.

"If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, 'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.'"

Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!"

Man: He must be so happy!
Woman: Who?
Man: Your father.
Woman: Why?
Man: Because he gets to see an angel everyday.

A woman who ran to the mall for a quick errand lost her purse, but an honest teenage boy returned it to her.

The woman looked inside her purse and remarked, "That's strange. Earlier I had a $20 bill inside, but now it's gone, and instead I see two fives and a ten."

"That's right," the boy explained. "The last time I found a lady's purse, she did not have change for a reward."