Best Jokes

“I have a pet manatee.”

“What’s his name?”

“His name is Hindenburg but I call him Hugh for short.”

“Oh! The Hugh Manatee!”

One night at the dinner table, the wife commented, "When we were first married, you took the small piece of steak and gave me the larger. Now you take the large one and leave me the smaller. You don't love me any more?"

"Nonsense, darling," replied the husband, "you just cook better now."

Wife to husband: Do you know what a closet is for?

Husband: Yes. A closet it wear I hang my clothes when all the door knobs are full.

Mary's fourth-grade homework assignment was to make sentences using the words in her spelling list, along with the definition.

Coming across the word "frugal" in the list, she asked her father what it meant. He explained that being frugal meant you saved something.

Her paper read...

Frugal: to save

Sentence: Maid Marion fell into a pit when she went walking in the woods so she yelled for someone to come get her out.

She yelled "Frugal me, Frugal me!"