Best Jokes

Four men were getting ready to tee off on the first hole when a gentleman walked up to the guy on the tee and handed him a card. It read "I am deaf and dumb. May I please play through?"

The guy says, "Get out of here! Some people use any excuse to get ahead! Go away!"

The deaf and dumb gentleman backed away and waited until the four guys were on their way down the fairway. The original four finally made it to the green, and it was the turn of the guy who yelled at the deaf and dumb gentleman to putt. He was lining it up, when suddenly 'Whack'! He got nailed on the back of the head by a ball and knocked unconscious.

When he woke up he was lying in a hospital bed, and the first person he saw was the deaf and dumb gentleman, holding up FORE fingers.

She claims we met at the vegetarian club, but I’d never seen herbivore.

Why were the Indians here first?

They had reservations.

A window, a toilet bowl and a colander (strainer) were arrested for some serious crimes and were brought to police headquarters for interrogation. After the detective was through with his questioning, he was met outside by the news media.

"We hear that they all had alibi's," asked one of the reporters. "Why didn't you believe the window's story?"

"I saw right through it!"

"What about the toilet bowl?"

"His alibi stunk!"

"And the story the colander gave you?"

"It was full of holes!"