I was having trouble with my computer at work so I called IT Support...
He said, "Have you tried disabling cookies?"
I said, "Well, I once bit the legs off a gingerbread man?"
Sally was telling her sister Jane about their sister in law, Candice, was recovering in the hospital following a car accident.
Sally said, "Candice told me that someone up there really loves her."
Jane, scoffing, replied, "No one could even like Candice. It's more like someone up there didn't want her."
On a recent trip to Washington, D.C., a family took a side trip to Arlington, Virginia.
While there, the patriotic father pointed out a well-known building to his son.
"Son, you see that triangular-shaped octagon over there? That's the Pentagon."
The pastor of the church was looking over the cradle in the church's soon to be put away nativity scene when he noticed that the baby Jesus was missing from among the figures. Immediately he turned and went outside and saw a little boy with a red wagon. In the wagon was the figure of the little infant Jesus.
So he walked up to the boy and said, "Well, where did you get him, my fine friend?"
The little boy replied, "I got him from the church."
"And why did you take him?"
The boy said, "Well, about a week before Christmas I prayed to the little Lord Jesus and I told him if he would bring me a red wagon for Christmas I would give him a ride around the block in it."