Before setting off on a business trip to Tulsa, I called the hotel where I'd be staying to see if they had a gym. The hotel receptionist's sigh had a tinge of exasperation in it when she answered.
"We have over 300 guests at at this facility," she said. "Does this 'Jim' have a last name?"
Barney: I have a three-season bed.
Wilma: What is a three-season bed?
Barney: One without a spring.
I can’t take my dog to the park because the ducks keep trying to bite him...
I guess that’s what I get for buying a pure bread dog.
What’s the matter with your wife, she looks upset?”
“She got a terrible shock.”
“What was it?”
“She was assisting at a rummage sale at the church. She took off her new $20 hat and somebody sold it for 50 cents.”