Latest Jokes

One day a woman called an auto mechanic to inquire when he could work on her car. "I'm not busy now," he replied, "bring it right in."

A short time later the woman pulled into the service bay, stopping her small car perfectly over the wide, deep grease pit.

"Wow!" remarked Wayne. "That's great driving. Your wheels only have a couple of inches to spare on each side of the pit."

She looked blankly at him and asked, "What pit?"

A woman walked into a library and wondered whether they had any books about paranoia.

The librarian replied, “They’re right behind you.”

A customer in a New York restaurant gushed to the chef, "Your veal parmigiana is superb! I spent a month in Italy, and yours is better than any I had over there."

"Naturally," the chef said. "Over there, they use domestic cheese. Ours is imported!"

As the three ladies picked up a menu, each put on a pair of glasses.

"I really only need mine for close reading," explained the first.

Remarked the second, "I only use mine when the light is bad."

The third confessed, "I rarely wear mine - except when I want to see."