An old-time pastor was riding furiously down the road, hurrying to get to church on time. Suddenly, his horse stumbled and threw him to the ground.
Lying in the dirt, his body wracked with pain, the pastor called out, “All you angels in heaven, help me get up on my horse!”
With extraordinary strength, he leaped onto the horse’s back—and fell off the other side. From the ground again, he called out, “All right, just half of you angels this time!”
I was working on making Thanksgiving dinner.
I was stuffing the turkey and realized how much I dislike raw turkey and raw chicken.
Then I realized its because they are fowl.
What does a pirate say on his 80th birthday?
"Aye, Matey!"