The minister gave his Sunday morning service, as usual, but this particular Sunday, it was considerably longer than normal.
Later, at the door, shaking hands with parishioners as they moved out, one man said, "Your sermon, Pastor, was simply wonderful - so invigorating and inspiring and refreshing."
The minister, of course, broke out in a big smile, only to hear the man say, "Why I felt like a new man when I woke up!"
What do snakes have on their bath towels?
Hiss and Hers...
At three o'clock one morning, a veterinary surgeon was awoken from a deep sleep by the ringing of his telephone. He staggered downstairs and answered the phone.
"I'm sorry if I woke you," said a voice at the other end of the line.
"That's all right," said the vet, "I had to get up to answer the phone anyway."
A man arrives at a rest home for his first day. He is greeted at the door by a woman.
She says, "You look like my 7th husband."
The man replies, "How many times have you been married?"
"Six."