Customer: I’ll have a hamburger.
Waiter: With pleasure.
Customer: No, with pickles and onions.
A flight attendant was on the red-eye to Manila when a water leak developed in the galley, which eventually soaked the carpet throughout the cabin of the 747.
A very sleepy passenger who had become aware of the dampness asked the attendant, "Has it been raining?"
Keeping a straight face, the attendant replied, "Yes, but we put the top up."
With a sigh of relief, the passenger went back to sleep.
The first rule of passive aggressive club is...
You know what, nevermind. It’s fine.
Why does a slight tax increase cost you $800.00, yet a substantial tax cut saves you only $30.00?