I do really feel bad for the Class of 2020. People say your senior year flies...
I just didn’t realize it would Zoom!
Donna: "I can tell if someone is lying just by looking at him."
Ashley: "Really?"
Donna: "Yep. I can tell if he is standing too."
The other day I got carded at the liquor store. While I was taking out my ID, my old Blockbuster card fell out.
The clerk shook his head and said, “Never mind,” and rang me up.
Dude 1: Hey, bro?
Dude 2: Yeah, bro?
Dude 1: Can you pass me that pamphlet?
Dude 2: Bro-chure...