Biology Teacher: Did you know that you have 60,000 miles of blood vessels in your body?
Little Johnny: No wonder I have tired blood.
Pulling guard duty in the army is dull work.
But I never realized just how dull until one night, with nothing else to do, I looked underneath my desk.
There I found these words scrawled by a predecessor: Man, you must really be bored!
During the first day of Navy Boot Camp, the lieutenant in charge had a stack of cards with each person’s name on it. He said, “When I read off your name, I want you to step forward, say 'Here, sir', then salute me, and then get back to where you were!”
Lieutenant: “Andrews!”
Andrews: “Here, sir!”
Lieutenant: “Cooper!”
Cooper: “Here, sir!”
Lieutenant: “Seeback!” (No response) “Seeback! (Still no response) “I said Seeback!”
The admiral next to him whispers something in his ear. The lieutenant then turns the card over and says: “Lodge!”
Lodge: “Here, sir!”
I’m close friends with 25 letters of the alphabet...
I don’t know 'y'.