Past Winners

My wife shot me with the nail gun today...

She must think I’m a stud!

I told my brother he was born on the highway.

After all, that’s where most accidents happen.

A man was getting married to a doctor's daughter. At the wedding reception, the father of the bride stood to read his toast, which he had scribbled on a piece of scrap paper.

Several times during his speech, he halted, overcome with what I assumed was a moment of deep emotion. But after a particularly long pause, he explained, "I'm sorry. I can't seem to make out what I've written down."

Looking out into the audience, he asked, "Is there a pharmacist in the house?"

Mrs. Marble, a Sunday School teacher, was telling her students about the time when Lot's wife looked back at Sodom she turned into a pillar of salt.

Little Percy interrupted. “My mommy looked back once while she was driving,” he announced, “and she turned into a telephone pole.”