Past Winners

You know your old when you look at Santa Claus and think...

"Gosh, he looks so young!"

I asked the surgeon if I could administer my own anesthetic.

He said, "Sure, knock yourself out!"

The Sultan of Brunei had 6 children, all girls. Therefore, he had no son and no heir. Imagine his joy then, when one of his wives presented him with his only son and heir. Just before his son's sixth birthday, the Sultan took him to one side and said, "Son, I am very proud of you. Anything you want, I shall get for you."

His son replied, "Daddy, I would like an aeroplane." Not wanting to do anything halfway, his father bought him British Airways.

Just before his son's seventh birthday, the Sultan took him to one side. "Son, you are my pride and joy. Anything you want, I shall get for you."

His son replied, "Daddy, I would like a boat." Not wanting to do anything halfway, his father bought him P&O Ferries.

Just before his son's eighth birthday, the Sultan took him to one side. "Son, you bring so much happiness into my life. Anything you want, I shall get for you."

His son, who had caught the 'Western movie' bug replied, "Daddy, I would like a cowboy outfit." Not wanting to do anything halfway, his father went and bought him Microsoft.

A boastful Englishman was holding forth on the merits of his watch to friends in New York City. At last, one of the American friends decided he could stand it no longer.

"That's nothing, "he interrupted. "I dropped my watch into the Hudson a year ago, and it's been running ever since."

The Englishman looked taken aback. "What!" he exclaimed. "The same watch?"

"No," he replied, "the Hudson."