Before crowbars were invented...
...most crows drank at home by themselves.
Can you please stop asking Santa for the perfect woman???
I almost got kidnapped 3 times today!!!
Little Johnny was spending a week on his Uncle Pete's farm and was helping with the chores. One day he was helping the farm hands to spread out a stack of hay to dry out.
Finally Little Johnny could contain his curiosity no longer so he asked, as he was wiping his brow, "Uncle Pete, is it a needle in a haystack we're looking for?"
Thanksgiving Day was approaching and the family had received a Thanksgiving card with a painting of a pilgrim family on their way to church.
Grandma showed the card to her small grandchildren, observing: "The Pilgrim children liked to go to church with their mothers and fathers."
"Oh yeah?" her young grandson replied. "Then why is their dad carrying that rifle?"