Past Winners

What do you call a snowman with a six pack?

An abdominal snowman.

A man told the ringmaster that he was interested in joining the circus as a lion tamer. The ringmaster asked if he had any experience.

The man said, "Why, yes. My father was one of the most famous lion tamers in the world, and he taught me everything he knew."

"Really?" said the ringmaster. "Did he teach you how to make a lion jump through a flaming hoop?"

"Yes he did," the man replied.

"And did he teach you how to have six lions form a pyramid?"

"Yes he did," the man replied.

"And have you ever stuck your head in a lion's mouth?"

"Just once," the man replied.

The ringmaster asked, "Why only once?"

The man said, "I was looking for my father."

I broke up with my girlfriend of 5 years because I found out she was a communist...

I should have known, there were red flags everywhere.

You miss 100% of the shots you DON'T take...

You also miss 95% of the shots you DO take...

You stink and you're off the team is basically what I'm trying to say.