Past Winners

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness...

... has never paid for a divorce before!

It was close to the beginning of a local lecture series when the usher announced, "There are only two single seats available."

"But you wouldn't separate a daughter from her mother, would you?" politely ask the older of two women who were waiting to be seated.

"You're quite right, madam, I wouldn't," replied the usher. "I did that once and I've been regretting it every since."

"I stand corrected!"

... Said the man in the orthopedic shoes.

Little Johnny was being shown the shape of the earth on a globe atlas by his mother. After pointing to all countries with unusual shapes, she asks: "Now Johnny, what shape is the world?"

Johnny, looking very wise and happy, said: "Daddy says it's in terrible shape."