Past Winners

In a small town, farmers of the community had gotten together to discuss some important issues. About midway through the meeting, a wife of one of the farmers stood up and spoke her peace.

When she was done, one of the old farmers stood up and said, "What does she know about anything? I would like to ask her if she knows how many toes a pig has?"

Quick as a flash, the woman replied, "Take off your boots sir, and count them yourself!"

What’s the matter with your wife, she looks upset?”

“She got a terrible shock.”

“What was it?”

“She was assisting at a rummage sale at the church. She took off her new $20 hat and somebody sold it for 50 cents.”

The pastor had been warned about a parishioner who was a fast reader.

"We shall now read the Twenty-third Psalm in unison," he announced. "Will the lady who is always by 'the still waters' while the rest of us are in 'green pastures', please pause until we catch up."

A woman saw an electrician walking up her drive and rushed to the door.

"Why did you come today?" she barked. "You were supposed to repair the doorbell yesterday?

I know," the electrician replied. "I rang three times. There was no answer, so I thought you must be out."