What does a dolphin say when he’s confused?
Can you please be more Pacific!
A man entered a stationery store and asked the clerk for a birthday/anniversary card. The clerk replied, "We have birthday cards and we have anniversary cards. Why not take one of each?"
The man said, "You don't understand. I need a card that covers both events! You see, we're celebrating the fifth anniversary of my wife's thirty-fourth birthday."
Why should the number 288 never be mentioned?
It's two gross!
One Sunday a pastor found several letters awaiting him. He opened one and found it contained the single word, "Fool."
Quietly and with becoming seriousness he shared the letter with the congregation and announced, "I have known many an instance of a person writing a letter and forgetting to sign his name, but this is the only instance I have ever known of someone signing his name and forgetting to write the letter."