Past Winners

Top ways high egg prices are changing the world:

Only the wealthy can now afford to walk on eggshells.

Eggs are now considered too good to scramble.

"Laying an egg" is now a compliment.

People are starting to ask for a cost-of-mayo raise.

You can have a steak. Or, for $2 more, an egg salad sandwich.

A stranger accosted an Irishman walking along a roadway in New Jersey. "Say, Pat, how far is it to Newark?"

"How did ye know my name?"

"I guessed it."

"Thin guess how far it is to Newark."

Jack: "I'm taking a weight lifting class. Every week the postal carrier brings me a new set of weights."

Bob: "Gee, you don't look like you've gained any muscle."

Jack: "No, but you ought to see the postal carrier!"

Apparently, keeping tropical fish at home can have a calming effect on the brain.

Must be all the indoor-fins.