Past Winners

What did the monkey say after its tail got caught in the lawnmower?

Won't be long now...

A boxer went to a doctor for treatment of insomnia.

"Have you tried counting sheep?" suggested the doctor.

"It doesn't work," replied the boxer. "Whenever I get to nine, I stand up!"

A first-grader came to the ophthalmology office where I work to have his vision checked. He sat down and I turned off the lights.

Then I switched on a projector that flashed the letters F, Z and B on a screen. I asked the boy what he saw.

Without hesitation he replied, "Consonants."

A farmer and his wife got into a huge fight after which the wife stormed off. The farmer says, "Where did you leave the tractor?"

The wife replies, "In the Mill field."

But there's no way into the Mill field!"

"There is now."