Past Winners

My dental hygienist retired, after 55 years of working...

All she got was a lousy plaque.

Two steps for making great tofu:

Step 1: Throw TOFU in the trash.

Step 2: Put a thick RIBEYE STEAK on the grill.

The gingerbread man fell while walking down a steep path and scraped his knees.

He was taken to the cookie doctor who asked, "Have you tried ICING it?"

Looking in the mall for a cotton nightgown, I tried my luck in a store known for its hot lingerie. To my delight, however, I found just what I was looking for.

Waiting in the line to pay, I noticed a young woman behind me holding the same nightgown. This confirmed what I suspected all along, that despite being over 50, I still have a very "with it" attitude.

"I see we have the same taste," I said proudly to the 20 something behind me.

"Yes," she replied. "I'm getting this for my grandmother for Christmas."