Two paramedics were dispatched to check on a 92-year-old man who had become disoriented. They decided to take him to the hospital for evaluation.
En route, with siren going, they questioned the man to determine his level of awareness. Leaning close, one asked, "Sir, do you know what we're doing right now?"
The old man slowly looked up at him, then gazed out the ambulance window.
"Oh," he replied, "I'd say about 50, maybe 55."
A hunting party, hopelessly lost in the mountains, blamed their guide for leading them astray.
"You told us you were the best guide in Colorado!" they cried.
"I am," he said, "but I think we're in Wyoming now."
Two friends were at a bookstore perusing through the nonfiction section.
Friend 1: "Oh my goodness, they have this book! It’s a really great book. I highly recommend it."
Friend 2: "Really? What’s it about?"
Friend 1: "Oh, about 357 pages."
One day two friends were talking when the conversation was getting serious.
Friend 1: "So, tell me. How do you feel?"
Friend 2: "Well, with my fingers."