Best Jokes

What's the difference between a $20 steak and a $55 steak?

February 14th.

When I heard A new medium opened shop in town, curiosity got the best of me, and I decided to drive down there and check it out in person. As soon as I sat down, the medium entered the room, came over and sat down across from where I was seated.

She laid her hand on my hand and said, "By the will of the spirits, you will walk today." I told her that I was not paralyzed, and I could walk. Again she said, " By the will of the spirits, you will walk today." Again I said that there is nothing wrong with me.

After the séance, I stepped outside and lo and behold… My car was gone!

What steps should you take if you ever come across a dangerous animal in the wilderness?

Very large ones.

Yo momma so poor, when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, and she said, "Moving."