Best Jokes

Lisa: Sardines have to be the stupidest fish in the world.

Meg: Why do you say that?

Lisa: They crawl into cans, lock themselves in, and then leave the key on the outside.

A tomato family is walking down the road.

Baby tomato falls behind.

Daddy tomato goes back and smacks him on the back of the head and says, “Ketchup!"

Once I went the extra mile...

But there were many feet and yards involved!

My mother and I were walking through the mall when a man stopped us to ask if we would take part in a survey. One of the questions was; "Do you think there is too much sex in movies?"

"I don't know," replied my mother. "I'm usually too wrapped up in the film to notice what the rest of the audience is doing."