Best Jokes

A big bullfrog is in the middle of the swamp crying out his lament about being stuck so far from all the action.

Out of nowhere this fairy godmother appears and tells him he will have an encounter with a beautiful young woman in three years. The bullfrog asks this fairy godmother why it will take so long.

"The woman is only in eighth grade now, and will not be dissecting frogs in Biology until her Junior year."

Question: What can you get if you have 50 cent?

Answer: Hip-Hop and Rap.

The widow requested that her husband's grave be dug 20 feet deep.

"Deep down he was a good man," she explained.

Charlie Brown, Snoopy, Dilbert, Dogbert, Garfield, Jon Arbuckle, and a whole lot of comic strip characters and their pets were on an airplane flying from Miami to Los Angeles.

In the middle of the flight, the flight attendant gave out food to everyone but Charlie Brown and Snoopy. They asked him why everyone else got some food and they didn't.

The flight attendant said, "Sorry, but we don't serve PEANUTS on this flight."