Best Jokes

Bob: "Uh, I’m bored."

Susie: "How bored are you Bob?"

Bob: "Plywood..."

Health inspector: "I'm afraid you have too many roaches in here."

Restaurant owner: "How many am I allowed?"

I only went to the pub for 'Naked Happy Hour'...

But I stayed until clothing time.

A young man was having some money problems, and needed $200 to get his car fixed and road-worthy again. But had run out of people to borrow from.

So, he calls his parents via the operator, and reverses the charge and says to his dad, "I need to borrow two hundred dollars."

At the other end, his father says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, son, I think there may be a bad line."

The boy shouts, "Two hundred. I need two hundred dollars!"

"Sorry, I still can't hear you clearly," says his father.

The operator cuts in, "Sorry to butt in, but I can hear him perfectly."

The father says, "Oh, good. YOU send him the money!"