Best Jokes

I told my boss that three companies were after me, so I needed a raise in pay to stay with the current job.

He asked which companies?

I told him gas, electric, and cable.

Why did the Lone Ranger have his bullets made in Cincinnati?

He wanted Ohio silver.

Did you hear about the inchworm that got upset?

He had to turn metric.

Sometimes when I'm depressed, I get a pregnancy test...

Just so I can say, 'Well, at least I'm not pregnant."