Remember back when we were kids, and every time it was below zero outside they closed school?
Me neither.
Accountant: "Doctor, I just can't get to sleep at night."
Doctor: "Have you tried counting sheep?"
Accountant: "Yes, and that's the problem! I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it!"
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
He was outstanding in his field!
I was driving down the highway when a fox ran in front of me. I slammed on the brakes and stopped in time.
I looked out over the hood of the car and there was the fox, all wide-eyed , looking back at me. It did the sign of the cross and went on its way.