Best Jokes

At a store, a lady stood in line waiting to pay for her items. Three men stood before her in the line. After 15 minutes she realized that the line wasn't moving at all.

She shouted at the cashier, "Is this line going to take all day long?"

The cashier replied, "Please step aside ma'am and come here. You are standing behind three mannequins."

A soldier in my National Guard platoon became concerned when the Army insisted that he sign up for direct deposit. "It’s not going to work for me," he said, panicked.

"Why not?" I asked.

"Because I use my Guard pay for spending money."

"So?"

"For the past ten years, I’ve been telling my wife that I serve for free!"