Latest Jokes

On the first day of Spring Training, a baseball scout brings a race horse with him to add to the starting line-up. The coach asks, "What did you bring that horse here for?"

The scout replies, "Wait until you see him bat."

All the players are laughing, until the horse comes to bat. At this point, the horse grabs the bat, and everyone quiets down. They stare at the horse. The pitcher, just shrugs his shoulders, and throws the ball toward home plate when astonishingly the horse hits the ball deep in the outfield.

The horse just stands there and does not move. The manager then yells at the baseball scout to tell the horse to run to first base. The scout looks back at the manager and yells back, "If he could run, he'd be at Belmont!"

Q: Why is there only one Yogi Bear?

A: Because the second one was a Boo-Boo.

To make sure I won't be late for work, my girlfriend calls me on the phone every morning to wake me up.

Wouldn't it be easier for her to just lean over, start shaking me, and yell, 'HEY! WAKE UP!'?

A frog, a duck, and a skunk went to the movies. The frog and duck were allowed to see it, but the skunk wasn't.

Why?

Because the frog had a greenback, the duck had a bill, but the skunk had only one scent.