Latest Jokes

A woman is getting on a bus when, just in front of her, a man gets up from his seat. She thinks to herself, "Here's another man trying to keep up the customs of a patriarchal society by offering a 'poor, defenseless woman' his seat."

She pushes him back onto the seat. A few minutes later, the man tries to get up again. Again, she refuses to let him up.

Finally, the man says, "Look, you've got to let me get up. I'm two miles past my stop already."

A Sunday school teacher was teaching her class about the difference between right and wrong. "All right children, let's take another example," she said. "If I were to get into a man's pocket and take his wallet with all his money, what would I be?"

Little Johnny raised his hand, and with a confident smile, he blurts out, "You'd be his wife or girlfriend!"

A grandfather and grandson were taking a nature hike together. The grandfather remarked how nature can teach us many lessons. The grandson asked which lesson was the most important one he had learned.

The grandfather replied, "Well, if you find a baby squirrel in the woods, don’t carry it in your shirt unless you’re wearing a very tight belt."

Guy goes and sees a psychiatrist.

Guy: I tend to over-exaggerate things.

Psychiatrist: How many times does this happen?

Guy: Over a bazillion times.