Latest Jokes

A couple go to a marriage counselor. The husband barely sits down before rattling off a long list of things his wife needs to improve on.

The counselor replied, "Wow, that's quite a long list. How about you ma'am, do you also have a long list of complaints?"

"Nope," she answered, "I only have one complaint."

"What might that be?"

"He lies!"

A woman made an appointment with a divorce attorney. The first thing he asked was why she wanted a divorce. She replied, "I’m not appreciated anymore and my husband even tells me I’m not a good house keeper."

The attorney replied, "Oh don’t worry, you’ll keep the house."

I didn't make it to the gym today...

That makes 1,523 days in a row I didn't go!